Getting Bigger?

Ok so before I get into my topic for the week, I’m going to give you my standard “fat comment to follow” disclosure.

I do not think I’m fat. When speaking of frustrations of weight gain, I am referencing a once smaller self – the one that existed when ephedra was legal, when I lived on natural light and trekked daily the hills of Athens. I do not think I’m fat but I am gaining weight and I am getting ready to bitch about it.

Today, I sat down and felt something on my lap. It felt like it was under my comfortable, loose dress. It almost felt like part of my own body resting with all it’s weight and glory right there on the top of my legs. What was it????? It was my stomach! My roll has gotten so big and lazy that it can’t even support itself – Oh I’m so hot.

I compare this realization to the women who don’t have boobs. Once they get pregnant, and the chest grows, they discover the boob pit. The boob is now so heavy it rests on the chest below, creating a nice place for sweat to gather.

So now I have a big chunk of fat resting on my legs. I am too lazy to even hold it up with my abdominal muscles – great, Sitting at a desk ALL DAY is really paying off.

I think I have to name this new belly pouch that is too lazy to hold itself up and break down any fat. Any suggestions, cause I think it’s going to be here for a while.