Tuesday, April 28, 2020

COVID 19 - Shelter in place, at a hotel

Now it's Sunday, March 22nd and we are checked into a local hotel. It seems as if we might be the only people at the hotel, which gives me relief that first, we are not annoying any other patrons and second, that we are not worried about catching or spreading the virus, so long as we keep our hands clean of course.

The first night was probably the hardest. Those of you with kids, especially those under 10, know how hard it is to get them to sleep in a hotel room. There's just too much excitement. It was probably 11:00 before all the kids were asleep. I crashed with them, but new sleeping arrangements provided many fitful sleepers. Jonathan and I were probably up together from two to four AM stressing about everything. Should we go home and clean up? Did we do the right thing, not getting second opinions? How are we going to pay for this? How long should we stay at the hotel? It was a long anxious, sleepless night.

The kids were up bright and early that first Monday morning. Did I mention our first full day in the hotel was also a busy work day for me? My employer, a bank, is an essential service. My work didn't stop. Instead it accelerated. We started preparing for upcoming changes while not yet feeling the economic impacts of the soon to be named "Great Lockdown". I was right in the middle of launching an 18 month long project that, as of now, is not expected to see the light of day for a long, long time.

They wanted breakfast, they wanted the pool, they wanted to explore, they wanted all the things. Honestly a month later, I'm trying to remember all the details but I think my brain is protecting me from remembering all the anxiety inducing aspects. I do remember the grace my friends and family showed and shared with me.

I worked. The kids swam. Joe ignored nap time. Jonathan managed the construction site at home. The dog came and went from the hotel. And I worked some more. I had conference calls from the pool, from the room, and pacing the hallways just trying not to get locked out of the hotel room (which did happen).










The staff was amazing, and became our hotel family. They tried to maintain all their normal services while maintaining social distancing restrictions. The morning breakfast was limited to danishes, fruit and coffee/juice. The eating area was closed off, but since we were almost the ONLY guests, they let us pull the chairs down and sit at a table like a normal family.



One of the perks they offered was a daily happy hour with wine and snacks. They graciously called us in our room to let us know when the cookies were warm from the oven, dubbing one of the employees forever in our hearts, "the cookie lady".

Still at the end of March, getting outside was only an option for one of those rare spring Ohio days. We rejoiced in the sunshine and walked around the commercial park on a rock hunt.


We were at the hotel from Sunday, March 22nd through Thursday March 26th. I wish could say that weekend was one of celebration, but instead we had two weeks of laundry, a sink full of dishes and muddy floors from many construction boots in and out of basement.

It also took a while for me to gain some control over my anxiety, given that huge expenses are usually a personal trigger.

I am so thankful that Jonathan handled all the construction logistics, negotiations and worked with ALL the subcontractors that were involved. He made sure all of the details were taken care of, the job was done well and the basement was SANITIZED. I know he probably doesn't know how much I appreciated it, considering I was losing my mind and yelling at him that he was running away from the hotel.That was me deflecting because I WANTED TO RUN AWAY. Being trapped in a hotel is NOT FUN.

I really do think the kids will remember it more as spring break and swimming, even if my memory is stunted due to the amount of my own anxiety and pressure. So now, we're back home and have been for a month. What does that look like? Well I'll need an entire new post to share my thoughts, reactions and opinions on how we are 'handling' this....


Thursday, April 9, 2020

COVID-19 - the sewage story

So yeah,

This is one for the ages.We are currently under orders from the government to shelter-in-place as a public health crisis of a world pandemic is upon us.I'm sure once this is over, or once we have a vaccine, there will be all kinds of views of how this impacted the world and the economy.

But for posterity's sake, this is about what we're experiencing right here, right now. School was canceled the week of March 16 for three weeks. Earlier this week, the closure was extended to May 1. There is a lot of doubt that the kids will go back this year. Our dear Nonnie also had to close March 23 through May 1 as well. 

So what does that mean for us. It means I am working from home for a bank (an essential service during this time of crisis). Jonathan is not working. And we have lesson plans for the Caroline and Maggie so they don't fall behind. 

As you gathered from my previous post I was feeling pretty sorry for myself because my big 40th birthday party was cancelled. No going out, no spa day, no time with my parents. I was sad, but that quickly turned into anxiety about all the small businesses that I know will not survive this. I quickly got over any self-pity and decided to take it all on - the work from home, co-parenting, teacher, toddler-wrangler and number-one mom.

It was Sunday, March 22 and I was motivated. (Total tangent this was the day that Jonathan and I met in Panama City 19 years ago!!) After a big breakfast for the whole family, I headed downstairs to start the mounds of laundry. 

I opened the door and was smacked in the face with stink. I pushed it away and went to discover what had died in our basement. I round the corner of the stairs to make out in the dark that the floor was wet and.... chunky. I pulled the string light on to see POOP. Solid turds resting on my basement floor as if the dog had been defecating in the basement. The only reason I knew this was not the case was the toilet-paper remains in the water that soaked the cement. 

I ran up the stairs, yelling "WE HAVE A PROBLEM! THERE IS POOP IN THE BASEMENT!" Obviously, I wasn't thinking. This proclamation only spiked their curiosity and drove all within earshot (everyone) down the stairs to see for themselves. 

After freaking out, calling anyone we could for help, confirming that they would come THAT DAY, the poop jokes, questions and accusations started...

Those aren't my poops, they must be stranger poop
They can't be the kids poop, it's too big
HOW did they come up from the drain fully formed? 
HOW MUCH IS THIS GOING TO COST 
Should we try and clean it up before someone comes to fix the problem?

The first person on the scene was Keenan. We greeted him at the door with all the gratitude and thanks. Keenan even jumped in on the jokes - "wow, those are some fresh turds." That comment struck me because I wondered what he usually sees when responding to a sewage backup? Stale turds? A question for another day...

Keenan outlined the options for us and the one that was recommended was cleaning the entire line with a blade (really just a high powered water jet). Yes, yes and yes - just fix the problem.

About an hour later reinforcements arrived to do the dirty work. As is typical fashion, Jonathan had a connection with the head of the crew. He had worked with his wife. Through the small talk, we learned that he was also a friend of Buck's. I think it was more divine intervention than happy accident that this Marine was the head of the crew.

As the crew got to work clearing the pipes, I busied the girls with tablets, shut Khali in the kennel, put Joe to bed for a nap and generally stayed out of their way. A flurry of activity ensued, including shouting to turn things on, people up and down the basement stairs and even some shouting. I tried to imagine this is all normal unless they tell me otherwise. The flurry calmed down and I hoped they were solving the problem.

They did not solve the problem, instead they FOUND the problem. The head of the crew came to find me. He didn't mince words, "you're screwed". I quickly grabbed Jonathan before I let him say any more. I needed us both to hear the extent of our screwage at the same time. My anxiety was already screaming in my face and I was fighting to ignore it.

He took us out to the back yard, right outside the house and pointed to a spray painted spot on the ground, only 2 feet from the foundation.

"The pipe is crushed. This is where we think it's crushed"

More words

"It could be crushed in other places in the yard."

More words.

"We have to dig. Homeowners insurance usually doesn't cover anything outside of the house. Just to dig costs $6,000 and then the remaining fees depend on what other problems we find"

More words.

Jonathan negotiating.

Anxiety screaming,

"The earliest we can have an excavation team here is Thursday."

Wait WHAT? Even that last statement made my anxiety shut up for a second. We are under shelter in place orders and have NO INDOOR PLUMBING with three little kids?

Considering how my mind was racing, I was surprised that I was able to calmly ask, "How are we supposed to go to the bathroom in the meantime?"

His response was akin to a shoulder shrug. I think he said something along the lines of let it sit in the toilet and don't flush....

At that point I told Jonathan to take over and excused myself before I melted into a pile of tears and anxiety. I went up to my bedroom and crawled into bed paralyzed with what to do next.

All the while the girls were annoying everyone on the internet with video calls through an app that I installed for distraction. Bubby and Grandpa were two of lucky recipients of the incessant call attempts. I should also add that the family was very aware of my current status because of the frantic WTF texts I was sending.

From the girls room I hear Grandpa, in his dad voice, instruct Maggie to bring the tablet to her mom. She brings it to me and I facetime with Dad as he tells me he's booked us a hotel for the night with adjoining rooms and a pool for the kids. No arguing, just go.

I cried with relief, exhaustion and gratitude to have someone just make the next decision. Thank you Mom and Dad.

The story will continue in the next post COVID-19 - Shelter in Place, Hotel Style












Tuesday, April 7, 2020

Turning 40 during a worldwide pandemic

This is the post I wrote when it all started, before the drama of the following three weeks ensued.

Watch for the next post shortly.


Written March 19 - 2020
Here I am, at home, where I shall be for the next three weeks AT LEAST. The Corona virus, COVID-19 has been named a pandemic. As I type this, here is the heart of the country, Ohio has closed all school, all major business with the exception of groceries, banks and hospitals. The restaurant industry is forced to only allow carryout. The financial markets are threatening to drop as fast as they did in the great depression. Interest rates are at 0%, but who can borrow money when they don't have a job to pay back the loan?

I am lucky that I work for a bank. Right now our focus is on crisis communication and digging deep to see what programs we can pull together to help the communities. Other than that, all initiatives have been halted. So I'm here, at home, with my whole family, trying to keep a sense of normalcy that is the last illusion of control over our lives. 

It feels like every day the pendulum of how I'm feeling emotionally swings dramatically and quickly from one side to the other. 

One moment I'm feeling safe, secure and purposeful. We'll ride this out for a couple weeks, weather the storm, protect those that are susceptible and be thankful we're in a position to do so. 

The next moment I'm reading scary reports of the death tolls in Italy, watching the stock market drop by double digit percentage points and thinking life will never be normal again. 

Just as quickly JoJo asks for a hug and I'm back to grateful that this virus is sparing most of the young children. 

Oh yeah, and yesterday was my 40th birthday. I mad a big fuss about my birthday this year, wanting to do something fun and different that included a night on the town. Well that didn't happen. And I'm really ok with that. The most frustrating part is all the people that said we'll get together when this is over. No we wont. I know that as quickly as this all began, we're going to want to erase it from our memory. Life will get busy again. People will be busy with their preoccupations and life will go on. I'm sure it was meant to be, but I'm going to feel sorry for myself all the same and admit that I"m disappointed.




  Added today,  4/7/20 - wow, I sound like a whiny baby. Little did I know, my plumbing had a lovely birthday present in store for me....



Wednesday, January 22, 2020

2020 what, how did that happen?

Remember me?


I actually have been really missing writing, typing, journaling, blogging, storytelling, whatever this was/is. Well on a lark, I tried to log in and guess what? My company is not blocking this URL or platform anymore. And because all my time not with my family is spent at work or asleep, I usually find time to write in between meetings, eating lunch at my desk or when I'm working late and need to switch gears.


So here I am. Back after TWO YEARS. Who am I kidding, 2018 was really about blogging, I was trying to catch up from not blogging since early 2017....


Ok, so the long short - We just celebrated our 11th wedding anniversary. Let me pause there, because while 11 years isn't that long, our marriage is only a tween, those years have thrown some serious challenges at us. We celebrate making it through it all and doing it together!


The lastbit, my JoJo is TWO and man he is a ham. If he isn't getting attention, watch out, he'll destroy everything in sight.


The ittytbit, Maggie Moo Margaret Jane Rinehart is 6 and all the things. She is an extrovert and social, happy and as spirited as you can imagine. She loves makeup, baby dolls, one on one time with me and is the best hugger. She is also as argumentative and stubborn as you can imagine. She can turn from rainbows and sunshine to thunder and tantrums in as fast as I can say no.


The babybit, Caroline Cat is 8, but she spends her time reading, listening to music and watching videos. This tiny girls wants to be a grown up more than I want to win the lottery. Much to her dismay, her sister is the same height as her, despite the two year age difference. Also, they've both lost the same number of teeth. The OLDEST child is very frustrated to not have a bigger lead on her sister....


And of course the furbabys. We sadly had to say good by to both our grown up pets, Sammy SO SO and Franklin the Buddy Cat. It's hard to even type those words because they were the pets (children) of our adulthood.


Our new adorable puppy dog was doomed from the start because Sammy was so precious. She is, however, 1rst in the kids heart. As it should be, she is more their dog, than mine and jonathans.


Jonathan is totally against another cat, and I started to pine for one...but I might just be missing the OG fluffmonster.


Ok, not much time to type as I have to run to a meeting. But hopefully they'll be more later.



Thursday, April 12, 2018

My last pregnancy - 2017 Retrospective


Posting from September of 2017

I’m officially 12 days away from my due date and I’m realizing how many fun stories I have and how few I’ve documented. Currently everyone at work is asking how I’m feeling, and today I feel fine. It seems as if I’m moving backwards. I was having more contractions and signs of impending labor last week than this week. Because of my age and gestational diabetic status, the Dr will induce me similar to the last two pregnancies. Eviction notice posted to the last bit. You must be out of my womb no later than 10/10!


At work –

I’m not sure if it’s the fact that I’m a new job where I don’t know everyone or that I’m at several locations or that this is my third pregnancy or that I’m carrying a boy differently than the girls, but I can’t go anywhere without strangers engaging me about my pregnancy. It’s all positive, but I keep joking that I need to make a game out of it. An over/under of how long it takes before someone says something.


The girls

I am pretty open with the girls about what happens with the baby and how he will come out. It’s not news to them, however Caroline had a classic reaction one night. She was confirming how baby JoJo would make his entrance to the world and said “EWWWW”. I looked at her and said, well that’s how you were born.” She looked me dead in the eye and said “Well, I did NOT like it”. I laughed so hard. Jonathan said I should have told her it was because she did it wrong… She was posterior, making her labor extremely difficult.

With Caroline in Kindergarten now, Maggie and I get a lot of time in the car together. It seems almost every other day she has a question about baby JoJo. I can tell she’s thinking about it because it’s those rare mornings or afternoons when she’s quietly looking out the window. She’s then ask me something like “Momma, will you be in the hospital when the baby comes? Will Dada pick me up from Nonnies?”

Or this question that took me a minute to decode, “Momma when I came out did it look like I had poop on my belly?” I think she saw a picture of another newborn and she was talking about the umbilical cord that was still attached…

 

For me

You are quite the mover and shaker. I would say you probably move the most of all three. It sure seems like you like my stomach as a pillow because I’ve had the worst indigestion with you. Sometimes I have to push you down to get some relief. I keep trying to remind myself what it’s like to have a newborn. Four years seems like a long time ago.

I know it’s going to be hard when you’re born that your Grandpa won’t be there to meet you. Your dad is going to have a hard time with that, but hopefully we can regale you with all the stories – because there are more than you can imagine.

 

Tuesday, March 13, 2018

2017 retrospective- Maggie’s 4

Dear Maggie Moo Margaret Jane,




You are four – what a mix of big girl, big sister and big helper while still holding strong to the night time toddler rituals, most notably the pacifier. I finally pulled the plug on that ritual just a month after your birthday. As is true to your nature, you balked but then accepted the inevitable. You also never give up. Still crying for your pacifier at bedtime, in the car and whenever you sense my weakness.



You talk all the time. So much so that I honestly don’t always listen. I just add the obligatory reply when you ask, ‘Right momma?”. I’m not even sure why you ask me anything because if I tell you an answer, you are certain to disagree and tell me what you believe to be the right answer.







You are nearly as big as your sister, which leads me to sometimes forget you are only four.

You love taking baths and playing with playdough or anything sensory. You are smart, in more ways than one. You will pretend to not know how to do something so you can get the attention of an adult.

You have your dad’s extroverted nature and charm. There are no strangers to you. Walking through the grocery store, you say hello to every single person, telling me loudly when they don’t respond in kind. You look forward to engaging with people in a way this introvert will never understand, but always admires. We both LOVE listening to you introduce yourself as “Maggie Moo Margaret Jane Rinehart” with confidence that suggests there is nothing odd about having five names. 



You have yet to learn your power, when you look up at me with round, wide eyes, full of innocence and hope and ask for something in the sweetest, most polite voice neither your dad nor I can say no. I think you can hear our hearts explode with love.


Currently your biggest challenge is pronouncing the word yellow – it comes out ‘little’. When you slow it down, YELL – OW, you can say it. Before you know it

You are hilarious, interesting and so much fun. You are also always thinking about others. You will bring me the last bite of your candy or letting your sister play with a toy first. 


As I post this, almost 6 months past your birthday, your speech is already clearer and I’m constantly surprised by your vocabulary and imagination. The other day, you saw a young tree with a protective fence around it through the car window and you said “aww, that little tree is in jail. Isn’t that sad momma?” Another day on a walk you were inventing a game where we weren’t supposed to walk on the cracks because you said they are “dangerous”. I mean, what four year old uses the word dangerous?


You are your father, with all his charm and intellect also comes what we’ve coined, transitionally challenged. Transitioning you from bed to the bathroom to getting dressed and out the door in the morning might be most exasperating part of my day. But you’re teaching me to be more patient so we can all start our day in a good mood even if we are a half an hour late all the time.


You will do great things my love. You make the world a happier place and there is no greater gift!