Monday, February 8, 2010

The white death

During this time of year, there isn't much going on. It's too cold to be outside, the sun had drained all local inhabitants of any positive attitude, and because of a stupid groundhog, there is no end in sight.

This means the only thing anyone ever talks about is the weather. Even the local news reporters are consumed by it. You can't turn on the TV without being blasted by some station claiming to be the WINTER WEATHER AUTHORITY.

They must wet their pants when there is actually a WINTER STORM WARNING. Last week the local news peed all over themselves when the warning actually came true and we got a foot of snow. More 90% of the local news was devoted to weather, the other 10% was devoted to things the weather affected, traffic, busy grocery stores, salt supplies, and the lot. I was actually embarrassed for them when I saw the breaking news broadcast that was an hour long, above and beyond their regularly scheduled programing. IT WAS ONE FOOT OF SNOW, people.

But wait, I can't completely blame the media outlets. They are IMHO, a reflection of society, giving people what they want. And all I heard people talk about was THE WHITE DEATH. Ok, they didn't call it "the white death" verbatim, but they were saying it with their fear.

The office CLEARED out by 2PM. Every event in town was cancelled. Before I got in my car, the warnings followed "BE CAREFUL!" "Drive Safely." "Call me if you get stuck." "Do you have a blanket in your car?"

Then there are the drivers. In the snow, in our city, there are two kinds - Petrified and Uninhibited. Both are scary.

The petrified drivers are a little more frightening. They are the ones that on the snow covered interstate ride the ass of the car in front of them. They find comfort in the ridiculously close proximity of the other car. Because of their own fear and the proximity of the other cars, they often do the dumbest thing, they hit their brakes...incessantly. If you are driving straight on a slippery surface, there are only a couple of things that will aid in loss of control, one of them is BRAKING. Now people, I'm not saying you shouldn't brake, but If you are traveling at a reasonable speed with REASONABLE distance between you and the car in front of you, LETTING YOUR FOOT OFF THE GAS should suffice in slowing down. These petrified drivers are the ones to stay away from, they will brake, fishtail and behave erratically all due to FEAR.

On the other end of the spectrum are the uninhibited drivers. You can find me in this category. These are the drivers that sometimes don't respect how slippery the road is. They are the ones flying by, weaving in and out of traffic because they are so annoyed with the petrified drivers. The weaving is one of the other things that will aid in loss of control. This group is a little less frightening because they aren't ruled by fear. And, considering I'm in this group, the uninhibited group tends to be better drivers. It's the drivers that make the road a dangerous place to be.

Have i mentioned lately that I hate winter?


Linda said...

If you still worked here, I would have walked over to your cube to give you personal round of applause.

Marci said...

I thought you'd appreciate that my fellow uninhibited driver.

Anonymous said...

I saw lots of uninhibited drivers in ditches this weekend.

Linda said...

I just tweeted about this blog post (and thought about it as I passed a car this morning that was going 25).

monkers27 said...

this uninhibited driver made to school and back with no problem (a 2 hour event) only to get stuck in the driveway. I made Mr B take a picture b/c i thought it was so funny that i was perpendicular to the garage!