Friday, October 25, 2013

Am I Ready for This?

I left the house today for my last day of work before Maternity leave. I would normally work until the due date but the sitter is off next week and I'll probably be induced by Friday.

As I left the house, Hubs said "this is the last time  you'll leave for work with only one kid". I immediately felt sad. I'm not sure why. I know that Hubs wasn't trying to make me sad, instead he is excited about the new adventure we are about to embark on.

I felt sadness that my one-on-one time with Babybit is coming to an end. Sadness and fear that the now manageable morning routine will have to be rediscovered and relearned. And of course, sadness surrounding the sleep I know I'll be missing out on in the coming months. My emotions were/are probably exacerbated by my fatigue. Within the past two weeks, both Hubs and Babybit have battled the same nasty virus. Whenever either of them are sick, I worry and fret and lose sleep until they are better. Oh yeah, and I'm 10 months pregnant, uncomfortable, achy and having irregular contractions that interrupt all attempts at sleeping.

We are so excited to give babybit a sibling and grow our family. I can't wait to meet him/her and fall in love with my new baby and tell you all about how different yet similar the two kids are. I can't wait to see how our family and our hearts grow with the new addition. But in the middle of all this excitement and anticipation, I allowed myself a morning of sadness to mourn the way things were, making room for the way things will be.

1 comment:

Mark Terrett said...

Oh! Now I am sad too. But it did not last long. You will see hop happy daughter number two makes you! Just as mine did for me!